Texts from Mallory Ortberg

Minor Airplane Tragedies

Takeoff omg

The Kindness of Strangers Who Happen to Be in a Helicopter When You Need One

So I’m Sat There Next to Richard Branson, Right?

“Hey 13B, what’re u doin 4 the next 6 hours?”

When to Buy a Plane Ticket

“Mayday! Mayday! Is this thing on?”

How to Survive a Helicopter Crash

My Gift of the Magi