Enjoy A Tea Tree Oil Face Steam

(lock that looks like a face via)

I’m not a doctor or a facialist. I’m not an herbalist or a hydrologist. I’m neither tea nor tree, nor am I oil. I’m not steam, and I’m not water, and I’m not a bowl. I’m not a chair or a towel. I’m not an apartment, nor am I a city. I’m not a state or a country. I’m not a continent, let alone a planet. What am I? Once you have your guess, please say it aloud.


You’ve got it.

I’m: a fan of the tea tree oil face steam, which I’d now like to recommend to you.

How do you feel when you wake up in the morning? I usually feel: tired, stiff-jointed, eyeball bad, want to die. For the tired I drink a coffee; for the stiff-jointed I do two sun salutations; for the eyeball bad, well, I don’t know what I do for that; and for the want to die I do a tea tree oil face steam.

What it is, if you don’t already know, is: you put a few drops of tea tree oil in a bowl and then pour boiling water over it. (Then you make coffee with the remaining boiling water.) Then you wait a few seconds so the bowl of boiling water and tea tree oil it’s not so hot that you burn your face off, and then you put your face over the bowl and a towel over your head and the bowl and keep it there for ten minutes while you listen to the “Morning News Brief” section of Morning Edition, if it’s available to stream. (Then, when you’re done, you have the coffee.) It’s very pleasant. Also it is very inexpensive, but it feels luxurious. I think you’re going to enjoy incorporating it into your routine if you choose to do so. If not, I don’t give a shit; it’s your funeral; I don’t care.

(If you don’t want to ruin the experience with news, you can also listen to music. That’s nice. You can also meditate. You can also think about all the things you were worried about that kept you from sleeping at night, though I don’t recommend it, though maybe sometimes that will be hard to avoid.)

The tea tree oil face steam is typically recommended to those with acne-prone skin, because tea tree oil is antibacterial, or whatever, I’m not going to pretend that I actually know anything but that’s what I read online, but it’s also just good for moisturizing and for making your skin look bright and clear and non-corpselike (in my experience) and for just having a pleasant experience in the morning. I love it. You don’t have to have acne to love it, is what I’m saying, but also you don’t have to brag about how you don’t have acne; it’s rude.

Once, a woman who works at Brooklyn Herborium told me that I shouldn’t steam my face without putting some sort of moisturizing oil all over my face first, to protect my skin. Maybe you’d like to take this advice. I wouldn’t judge you for taking it. Personally, I only put oil pre-steam on my eye skin area and on on my lips, but I live recklessly and with abandon and so far that sort of behavior is only working for me somewhat. Yesterday I had cheetos for dinner, for example, and popcorn. So maybe you’d like to cover your whole face.

I think you’re going to like this, if you don’t do it already. Everything is so terrible now. The only good part of the day anymore, I’ve found, at least for me, is the very early morning before everything fully gets started. From 6AM to 8AM. That’s when I do my best padding around the apartment, my best listening to the news on the radio, my best stretching, my best tea tree oil steam. It’s nice. I guess other people exercise during this time but instead of that I like to do nothing (the things I listed). Maybe you’re the same way.

Everything is very depressing, but this is nice (the face steam). I feel like this post sort of took a turn at the end. Oh well. Do the thing or don’t. Actually. I guess let me see if I can turn it around, this seems like a bad way to end. Hmm. It’s important to find little pleasures. The sound of rain, etc. Maybe a little box you’ve had forever and it’s very beautiful and you keep jewelry inside of it, or guitar picks. A toothbrush you love. The snore of a dog.

Annnyway, I love you!