Will the Corpse Flower Bloom Today?

It smells like rotting flesh and, baby — you’re gonna love it.

Image: New York Botanical Garden

“Corpse flower.” That’s my nickname for you. It’s also the name of a flower that takes at least five years to bloom, and then smells like a rotting corpse once it does. It’s my flower for you. The New York Botanical Garden hasn’t had an in-bloom corpse flower — or Amorphophallus titanum — since 1939, but don’t feel sorry for the New York Botanical Garden, because guess what?

[AIRHORN] They’re gonna have one any second!!!!!!!!!! Or maybe in a few days!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

According to Popular Science, the sickos at the NYBG have been tending to their corpse flower since 2007 and expect it to bloom — any minute. Or, if I’m being honest, it seems like they expected it to bloom — yesterday. But now this is what they’re saying:

UPDATE: After a weekend of excitement, the high temperatures in New York did not impact the Corpse Flower’s growth as our experts anticipated. The plant is still progressing, but its bloom remains difficult to predict (as nature sometimes loves being). We’ll post updates as we’re able. Thanks to everyone who’s been following along — we’re just as anxious as you are to see the final result!

“Experts” — yeah right.

Anyway, who knows when this disgusting old plant is gonna bloom, but, if you want, I invite you to keep the livestream open in a window until you forget about it.