How to Get That Surfbort Hair

1. Be drankin’

2. Sing on the mic ’til your voice gets hoarse

3. Then you fill the tub up halfway

4. Then you ride it with your surfbort,

5. Surfbort,

6. Surfbort

7. Then you grain on that wood, grain, grain on that wood

8. Then just swerve on that, swerve, swerve on that big body

9. Keep serving all this, swerve, surfing all in this good,

10. Good.

11. Wow, look at you. You have surfbort hair.

(Or, also, you could follow this actual tutorial with Kim Kimble, Beyoncé’s hairstylist.)