Sweet Talk or Real Talk: Decoding First Date Compliments
by Rose Surnow
What he says/ What he means
1. You are unlike any girl I’ve ever dated/ My family doesn’t really like Jews.
2. I wanna take you to the beach, cuddle up with some blankets and watch the sunset/ I’m broke.
3. You have this special way about you/ Were you home-schooled?
4. You are hilarious/ Which is why I’m not attracted to you.
5. I feel like I could tell you anything/ I am Kaiser Sozay.
6. Your hair is GORGEOUS. Who cuts it?/ I’m just tired, maybe we can have sex another time, like when you turn into a boy.
7. I love you/ I’m super crazy.
8. You’re so cool, I wanna smoke weed with you/ Yes, TECHINCALLY, I’m 35, but wait until you see my room!
9. You have an incredible smile/ I collect teeth for the forest witch.
10. You’re great in bed/ Nice knowing you.