The Spinning Childbirth Table Never Really Caught On

The idea behind the Apparatus for Facilitating the Birth of a Child by Centrifugal Force (patented in 1965) was that the mom would spin around on a board until her baby fell out into a net. And the reason a ’60s woman needed this was that her stomach muscles were too weak:

In the case of a woman who has a fully developed muscular system and has had ample physical exertion all through the pregnancy, as is common with all more primitive peoples, nature provides all the necessary equipment and power to have a normal and quick delivery. This is not the case, however, with more civilized women who often do not have the opportunity to develop the muscles needed in confinement.

A little more on the net:

Means are provided to assure the safe delivery of the fetus and to stop the machine immediately upon such delivery. These means comprise a pocket-shaped reception net [88] made of strong, elastic material and supported under tension by tail ropes [89] secured at one end by the tail hook [90] to the tail mast [91] fixed to the outer end of plate 65, and secured at their other diverged ends by the hooks [92] to the thigh holders [68].

If you like amusements parks and having babies, maybe you can build your own — there’s lots more instructive pictures at the source. It might be tempting to get on it too early, though, before your nine months are up. Sort of like when you grow carrots and pull them up just to check how they’re growing.