Make Your Urine Smell Like Violets

by Bonnie

Get your hot sex tips riiiight here, and just in time for Valentine’s Day.

I must at the outset ask the reader’s indulgence when discussing the intimate details of any one of the functions, which, if we employ the comparative method, are highly important on account with their analogy with the other functions, but in themselves are not very savory… anyone who is annoyed by these physiological details, need not read any further; he must realise that he is scientifically not sufficiently emancipated to be able to study such questions sufficiently

First, the author reminds ladies to take pity on men in need, by comparing their plight to that of a child doing the pee-pee dance.

I beg the reader carefully to consider the familiar picture of a child suffering; it is a picture of suffering mankind, wrestling with its bodily needs.

If you do help a guy out though, be warned that when he is satisfied…

…the smell is stale and something like decomposing leeks

And keep in mind that…

…testes and ovaries have always been considered glands, whereas they are in realty tumours

In the mood now? Get ready for love by bathing as the doctor advises, with a solution of 10% Lysol in water or alcohol. That’s fine for everyday, but if you’d like to do something special, say for Valentine’s Day, here you go:

…if for example small traces of oil of turpentine are swallowed or even inhaled the urine will assume a pleasant odour of violets

Strangely, no advice here on how to display what you’ve done there. That’s up to you. But some general precautions are to be found.

One must not always show one’s true nature, especially in the sexual sphere; for instance if a girl shows openly how much she is in need of sexual satisfaction, this frankness is only too quickly taken advantage of; even if only in words or external behaviors towards her.

If you’re beginning to notice that the doctor reveals more about himself and his own preferences perhaps, then that of all mankind, you’ll be relieved when he finally shows his cards.

People with southern or oriental temperament, who have very lively and active habits, might easily give the impression that they are fearfully sexually inclined; while, although, we in our colder climates are less demonstrative, we perhaps feel passion more deeply and permanently.

Who was the southern tramp who broke your heart? We ask. The doctor looks out the window and his eyes go dark. “Her urine smelled like violets,” is all he will say.

From a 1940 posthumous collection of Dr. J. Rutgers work. He died in 1924