Geordie Shore

by Liz Colville

Some MTV executives were sitting around one day going, “Where can we take Jersey Shore next, literally? Where can we put it? Is there another Jersey somewhere in the world?” Yes, actually, there is the namesake of New Jersey, but no, too small, so MTV, like the time it took Alexa Chung away, back to a place where people would get her jokes or whatever they were, is going to be taking the seed of Jersey Shore and planting it in Newcastle, where residents are often referred to as “Geordies.” I would actually like to see Geordie Shore, but as Warming Glow points out, we’d need subtitles because the accent is pretty hard to understand, even if you’re living on the same land mass as Geordies, as this above clip from I’m Alan Partridge demonstrates.

MTV’s statement:

We want Newcastle’s hottest, funniest and fittest people for this exciting new show. We want people who are proud of their Geordie roots, love to party, are good-looking, can turn heads and are up for a laugh.

I keep imagining real-life versions of the council flat gangster Johnny White from Skins, which would be great, even though he’s from Bristol:

No matter what, this is definitely going to be better than Canadian Shore

or whatever it’s called, sorry, my brethren.