We Have Got to Get These Chimps Some Better Dolls

Doll-enthusiast chimpanzees are making do with sticks and small logs, “cuddling them, creating games and even putting them to bed, [devastating] new research finds.”

These chimps need a Johnny Appleseed/Jane Goodall-type to carry a sack of good, real dolls through the jungle. Maybe the sack would be big enough that huggable orangutan-toddler dolls could fit in there, too. “Do you know what a DOLL is? Can you say doll?” And the JA/JG-type would wait until until the chimp could say it properly so they’d feel they earned it and not just benefited from charity.