The Angelina Jolie Doll Looks So Much Like Angelina Jolie

Do you know someone who needs an Angelina Jolie doll this Christmas? Do you need an Angelina Jolie doll, right now? In five hours, this one-of-a-kind handmade masterpiece will be selling for at least $400 on eBay.

She’s the kind of doll you’d one day let your daughter play with as a great courtesy, except inevitably you’d forget to take it back, and your daughter would just keep it in her room for months and months, and then one day you’d be putting sheets away in her closet when you’d see the doll, and it would be naked and its hair would be all messed up, and you’d panic, and maybe scream something a little too intense, like “Where’s the pantsuit, why did you ruin her, I can’t trust you with ANYTHING!”

And then you’d go upstairs, fuming, clutching the doll, with your daughter downstairs — maybe she’s crying, maybe she’s just like, ‘WTF?’ — and it’s not even that Angelina’s ruined, really, it’s just that her bangs have shifted or something, and it’s not the end of the world, obviously, because she’s just a DOLL, you just need to… you just need to collect yourself for a second. Just. Just give yourself a second.